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Starting this Saturday the fella’s at LYH (thats Legendary Yorkshire Hero’s, dontcha know) will be starting a new classic rock night promising to play us all of this stuff: ‘AC/DC, Journey, foreigner, metallica, heart, iron maiden, aerosmith, drowning pool, linkin park, sabbath, rush, bad company, flyleaf, kings of leon, uriah heap, boston, styx, lou gramm, motorhead, scorpions, buckcherry, shinedown, poison, warrant, winger, kid rock, vain, motley crue, faster pussycat, whitesnake, def leopard, zz top, kiss, dio, foo fighters, green day, thin lizzy etc’. Which is certainly tasty enough.

Tragically they still felt a need to advertise themselves as playing songs ‘in the tradition of the Mayfair from 70s right up to now the 00’s’ which only worries me because I’m sick to fucking death of people blithering on about the Mayfair. Even more worryingly for those of us who rue the stuck in the past nature of Newcastle’s rock scene, its also a throwback to Suzies rock night. To the extent its advertising itself as being in that nights old venue, the City Tavern (which has also been Shamrox for a good long time, before now becoming the Head of Steam run LYH). Clearly its being targeted at the older Geordie rocker. However, I have some hopes for this night as it’s run by the guys behind Hellfire, who are rather good. Indeed their presence makes me think this could actually be quite popular with the younger crowd and they’ve simply been missing an obvious trick with their advertising. If nothing else, the night is free so you have nothing to lose by going to check it out!

The night runs from 8pm – 2am every Saturday with free entry throughout (and indeed offers food, and by virtue of being a Head of Steam, more than just shit larger).

Click me for the facebook group

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Some gigs you may or may not be interested in for the 2010 Sage Gateshead calendar. Given the vast levels of soul destroying apathy in Newcastle I doubt many, if any, will convert said vague interest into actually going. Still, worth a shot…

Monday, March 1st – Cabaret Excentrique, Hall Two, £13.50

A return of the hugely popular cabaret show. A gloriously alternative modern day variety show to open the Newcastle Gateshead Comedy Festival featuring top performers from the fields of burlesque, bellydance, acrobatics, aerial circus, music, dance and of course stand-up comedy – all hosted by Radio Newcastle DJ Alfie Joey. Early booking is advised. Contains partial nudity.

Tuesday, March 2nd – The Rob Deering Experience and Andrew Lawrence, Hall Two, £12.50

Rob Deering (and his guitar)
The finest double act working in Britain today – combine razor-sharp stand-up with incredible flights of musicianship to create the ultimate Rob Deering experience – not so much a one man band as a one man comedy Woodstock.

Andrew Lawrence
The double if.comedy award nominee, most recently seen in BBC 3’s ‘Ideal’, comes to Gateshead with his new stand up show.

Thursday, March 4th – Relax Everyone its Carl Donnelly / Pete Johannsen – Naked Pictures Of My Life, Hall Two, £12.50

Carl Donnelly
Nominated for “Best Newcomer” at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe, Carl brings his multi-award winning comedy to Newcastle. Come along, kick back and laugh yourself silly at his tales of life as a 21st century slacker.

Pete Johanssen
Endearingly dirty, whimsically honest, an unabashed postmortem of a very funny man’s insecurities about his ageing body, non traditional life and unusual circumstances. Pete was also nominated for “Best Newcomer” at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe.

Friday, March 5th – Stephen Carlin – Blows the lid off the whole filthy business / Robin Ince vs The Moral Majority, Hall Two, £12.50

Stephen Carlin
Chosen by Stewart Lee as one of his ten best stand-ups ever, Airdrie-born Stephen Carlin’s art lies in his ability to quarry wildly original material from the most conventional of starting points. By taking run-of-the-mill observations and then applying his relentless but warped logic, he constructs towers of comic artistry, skilfully delivered in his deadpan Scottish brogue.

Robin Ince
Brand new solo show from “the country’s most intellectually audacious comedian” (Evening Standard).
As seen on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, Mock The Week, The World Stands Up; as heard on Radio 4’s new science-and-comedy show The Infinite Monkey Cage and News Quiz, or known to millions as the put-upon touring partner from Ricky Gervais’s Fame and Politics DVDs.

Sunday, March 7th – Northern Glory – Dave Johns, Patrick Monahan, Gavin Webster, Carl Hutchinson and Tony Jameson, Hall Two, £13.50

The closing show of the 2010 Newcastle Gateshead Comedy Festival, as ever featuring only comedians born and bred in the North East.
The fabulous comics this year are TV stars Dave Johns, Gavin Webster, and Patrick Monahan, with support from up and coming newer comics Tony Jameson and Carl Hutchinson.

Saturday, March 13th – AV Festival: Sounds of Science, Northern Rock Foundation Hall, £8

An evening of sonic experiments with unusual sound sources including: an audio-modulated Tesla coil, firework sparklers, levitating gold and a block of dry ice. Artificiel present the UK premiere of POWER, an audio-visual performance of striking images and sounds from a Tesla coil; Rhodri Davies plays an electric harp on a block of dry ice for the first time; Lee Patterson amplifies the sound of multiple burning sparklers; and Evelina Domnitch and Dmitry Gelfand levitate slivers of spinning gold leaf in a sound wave. Four extraordinary live music performances by artists who explore the science of sound, in collaboration with Newcastle Science Fest.

Curated and produced by AV Festival 10 in partnership with Newcastle Science Fest and The Sage Gateshead

Sunday, March 14th – English Journey Revisited, Hall Two, £10-12

Special closing night performance written and performed by award winning writers Iain Sinclair (Lights out for the Territory, London Orbital) and Alan Moore (V for Vendetta, Watchmen). Inspired by the 1934 book English Journey, JB Priestly’s recession era account of his travels from London to the North East, the performance will narrate an alternative journey offering new social observations and predictions of the future.

A stunning new immersive soundscape will be performed by musicians: FM Einheit (from influential 1980s German band Einstürzende Neubauten), Stephen O’Malley (founder of leading drone doom bands Sunn O))), KTL, Grave Temple) and Susan Stenger (leading performer of music by John Cage and Christian Wolff and founder of Band of Susans, The Brood, Big Bottom). A new projected moving image work by Iain Sinclair and artist Graham Dolphin following their residency at the Northern Region Film and Television Archive completes this unmissable experience

Tuesday, March 16th – Turin Brakes, Hall Two, £17.50

More details to follow.

Tuesday, April 20th – Peter Hook – Unknown Pleasures, Hall Two, £14.50/£16.50

Based on his best selling book ‘The Hacienda – How Not To Run A Club’ the bass-slinging Manchester legend tells the story of this iconic club, New Order, Joy Division and the Madchester scene, from the haze of 1980s acid house to the 1990s gangs, drugs and corporate greed.

A funny and engaging raconteur, Hooky’s personal account of the people – Tony Wilson, Bernard Sumner, Shaun Ryder – and the era is sadder, scarier and stranger than you could imagine. Hear the stories that were not allowed in the book. A tale of fun, success, lost money, confusion and true faith; featuring multi media footage and a Q&A session.

Wednesday, March 21st – Boy George, Hall One, £7/£25

As the front man of legendary 1980s group ‘Culture Club’, Boy George needs little introduction. He remains one of the world’s most recognisable pop and fashion icons, with numerous hit songs to his name, including ‘Do you really want to hurt me’ and the evergreen pop classic ‘Karma Chameleon’.

George returns to the live stage performing all the hits from Culture Club, gems from his solo career and some great covers, as well as new material.

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Its already been a week since the TaintedLover Christams party. Now I know you wont all believe me, clinging as you are to your awards of chocolate buttons and memories of kazoo based frivolity, but I assure you its been a full 6 days now. Time, I think you will all agree for us to take stock, and discuss just how very super awesome it actually was. It was a pretty nice turnout, with members old, current, and indeed very very new all showing up to meet up and see if we could ever all be IRL friends (the lights! They’re so bright!) As it happens the times were fun and good indeed. Helped all the more by discount for members offered at the Urban Halo stall set up in Trills for the night (Click me)

The soundtrack to the night was supplied by our very own guest DJ’s NSFTM, Ásfríðr, -Kay- and a particularly well received Niflheim set. It seemed there were only positive accolades to be passed onto the DJ’s and if you didn’t like it, well you should have voted shouldn’t you! Or better yet, next time around put yourself forward and show these guys how you want it to be done! Not only were we treated to some quality music however, I have vague memories (thats all I can manage thanks to Trillians being awesome enough to launch their new pound party at the event) of sausages, pineapples, and the obligatory cheese all being skewered onto cocktail sticks. If there’s one thing a party needs for it to be a success its very definitely a sausage on a stick. Also, feeding the Trillians staff may have helped appease them all for the ungodly sight the random firing of 100 party poppers leaves. And by random I do of course mean ‘carefully targeted at NSFTM’s face’.

The night wasn’t all about party food and music though. There was a more serious goal which was of course to raise funds for the Great North Air Ambulance (Click me). To do this we were generously supported by Trillians itself, who kindly supplied a number of raffle prizes (including the star priaze fake moustache that seemed so alarmingly popular. Whats that saying about simple minds…). Larger prizes were supplied by Travelling Man (Click me) who donated a comic book we all wanted, but which was won in the end by Duxey (damn her). The amazingly generous folks at 3rd and 56th street provided us with a full £30 worth of vouchers (click me) which was won by two lucky revellers. I dont remember who exactly though… (Recall the cheap drinks offers). In all we managed to raise £36 for charity which is not to be sniffed at at all! Thank you to all who took part in the raffle and to all who donated prizes! The next mile of fuel to a stranded Cockermouthian is on TaintedLover!

Nicely drunk, the evenings entertainment moved on to the TL awards, 2009! The final standings were as follows:
Member of the Year: Nostawnevets
Mod of the year: Nostawnevets
Newbie of the year: That_Jaimie_Fella
Tard of the Year: Moucho_Blasto
Most deserves to be Violated: -Kay-
Best baps in the show yourself topless thread (Pervs, click me)
Finest ass on TaintedLover: Nostawnevets and -Kay-

So clearly, I rule. I’ll be working hard on my ass to overtake -Kay- for a supreme victory next year! Winners were treated to some chocolate coins of unusual girth.

The awards ‘ceremony’ over, (most ceremonies dont have cat calls for the exposure of bums and boobs, but I for one would like to see this change) it was time to head to Get Y’ Skates on who had rather generously provided us with a full 30 guest list places! There the already merry TaintedLovers were treated to the diverse musical stylings of the night and were able to shake their cute (but not as cute as my) little asses to their hearts content. I think its safe to say they got their money’s worth out of us! I do love Skates. Good music, good people, bad drunken dancing. What more could you ask for! (Seriously, let us know and we’ll try and sort it for next time!)

Eventually however, it was time to go home, and spend a week contemplating just how much life sucks when you aren’t at a TaintedLover Christmas party. Still, there’s always next year. When hopefully, more people will take this man up on his offer. Merry Christmas TaintedLovers!

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A busy year for North-East promoters Floorshow is set to end on a high. Dutch EBM giants Grendel perform, in support of new EP ‘Circuits and Chemicals’ at the Independent in Sunderland next week on the 10th of December.
Grendel are famed for their hard-EBM dance floor fillers. If you’ve ever been in Tech Noir you’ll have danced to ‘Soilbleed’ and their 2007 ‘Harsh Generation’ album was commonly regarded with one of the best in its genre.
The band are joined by Uberbyte and local lot System:FX.
Uberbyte woo’d a crowd at the Independent earlier this year when they toasted a crowd waiting to see the mighty Combichrist. Their second album ‘Dos’ has had several tracks pounding on industrial dance floors around the country – and for this show they’ll be previewing tracks from forthcoming third album ‘EXS’. I’ve been lucky enough to have already heard tracks such as ‘The Promise’ which keep the beats pounding and heart pumping.
Despite being from Sunderland, System:FX are better known at the other side of the country. Now based in London, the three-piece have performed at many high-profile shows in our nations capital with bands such as Combichrist and Alec Empire.

Tickets are a very reasonable £12 from the likes of www.seetickets.com and www.ticketweb.co.uk – there’ll also be an allocation on the door – which will be priced higher.

This show caps off what has been a hectic year for the Floorshow crew. The year started with an announcement that Combichrist would be playing the North-East for the very first time and electronic and Gothic legends such as Apoptygma Berzerk, Das Ich and The Cruxshadows have also all performed.
As a result of this, other bands have started to take note and many other touring bands, relevant to the Goth/Electro scene have started pushing for NE dates, the likes of The Birthday Massacre and Emilie Autumn each gaining dates in the Newcastle Academy.

While Grendel caps the end for 2009 it’s certainly not the end. The folks at Floorshow say they’re awaiting confirmation that they can announce a show they’ve got booked in April, and assure us that they’ve raised discussions with many other touring acts.

That’s right; A fun filled night of frollicks, debauchery and nonsense at everyone’s favourite rockbar! The DJs have been announced, and it looks like it’s going to be the legendary NSFTM, alongside his trio of assistants, -kay-, Niflheim and Ásfríðr. There’s tons of stuff to giveaway including guestlist places for Get ‘y skates on afterwards, vouchers for 3rd and 56th street (formerly Kathmandu), stuff from Travelling Man, an Urban Halo (hair stuff) stall with discounts for TaintedLover members and there’ll no doubt be loads more shennanigans throughout (and after) the night!

There’s usually a door charge to get into Trillians on a Tuesday, but if you want to get in for free you’ll need to check out the Forums.. there’s a thread called ‘TL Night Password’ but you’ll have to hunt it out for yourself

Trillians will also have a range of drinks offers including;

Carling
John Smiths
Strongbow
WKD
Jack Daniels
Smirnoff Ice
Budweiser
House Wine (175 ML white/red/rose)
Sambuca

all just £1.50! There’ll also be the usual £1 Corky shots, £1.60 Jagermeister, £3.20 double Smirnoff + Red Bull, £3.75 double Jagermeister + Red Bull..

We’ll also be announcing the winners of the TaintedLover awards 2009.. tonight will be your last chance to vote, so get your votes in NOW!
Member of the Year
Mod of the Year
N00b of the Year
Tard of the Year
Who most deserves to be Violated?
Who has the finest baps in the ‘post a picture of yourself topless’ thread? (this one is NSFW! You have been warned )
Who has the finest ass?
check the threads out, make your votes and come to the nights to find out the winners!

So.. I’ll see ya at the bar, right?
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‘Poke’ is a new alternative music night aimed at the gay and alternative crowd in Newcastle. It held its first night on the 24th October at The End bar and following its initial success, has just been awarded a second night at the same venue on the 19th of December. Interested in all things alternative as we are, we caught up with the event organisers-come-DJs, who, awesome as they are, granted us an interview.

First up, can you give us a quick overview of just what Poke is? What makes you different to other gay nights and what kind of music and bands can I expect to hear if I was to go along?

POKE is an independently run club night designed to offer an alternative to the established Newcastle gay scene. Punters at the launch night were treated to an eclectic playlist that took in classic artists such as Bowie, REM, Blondie, Nina Simone, Talking Heads, Joni Mitchell and Siouxie & the Banshees right through to newer offerings from the likes of Phoenix, The XX, Muse, Emiliana Torrini, Los Campesinos! and Friendly Fires.

Why be different? What was your motivation?

Having spoken to many people about their experiences on the scene, it became apparent that there was a definite sense of disillusionment about the lack of variety that it offers. The vast majority of the bars and clubs seem content to draw on established gay stereotypes with regards to their music policies, and while we understand that many people enjoy this, there are an equal number who don’t get any sense of satisfaction out of the latest hi-NRG remix of Girls Aloud’s latest chart topper. We wanted to provide a place where people could dance to something different, to not have to rely on straight clubs to get their alternative music fix.

Poke certainly doesn’t fit the stereotype of a ‘gay’ night, so you guys could be seen as a risky venture. Did you find it difficult to find a venue?

The options available on the scene are very limited but we felt it was important to hold the night in this area; we wanted to make it apparent that POKE was conceived principally to serve the gay and lesbian community, and not for it to become lost amongst the other alternative nights within the city. We also didn’t want to segregate ourselves in any way, but rather to enrich the scene. With this in mind, The End Bar seemed to be an obvious choice of venue and they proved to be very supportive of what we were trying to achieve.

You had your first night this October. How did you think it went? Did you encounter any unexpected problems on the night? Is there anything you wish you’d done differently?

It went exceptionally well. We knew that there was a niche for this kind of night but we were genuinely amazed at how popular it turned out to be, particularly as we’d relied a lot on word-of-mouth to promote the launch. The number of people on the dance floor and subsequent demands for us to make this a regular event proved that we’d certainly achieved our remit.

You have a second night, how likely do you think it’ll be for Poke to become a regular feature?

To paraphrase Kevin Costner, if we POKE them, they will come! We really believe that there is a strong enough demand for such a night, so we plan to do it for as long as people want it.

It seems every two weeks that there’s a new alternative night in Newcastle, and most barely make it past their first month. And now with many long standing and seemingly secure nights losing their venues, what, if anything, can you guys do to make sure Poke avoids this fate?

We believe the lamentable lack of alternative nights on the gay scene puts us in a stronger position than other similar nights elsewhere in town. We hope that in simply providing an alternative for an under-represented demographic, we can rapidly build a solid following. Furthermore, we don’t wish to be too precious or snobbish about the music we play – why shouldn’t Interpol snuggle up with Justin Timberlake from time to time?!

‘Poke’ returns in time for a cliché free Christmas party on the 19th December.
Click here for Poke’s Facebook page
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Photographs by Sophie F. Baker

Distortion is the latest weekly rock night to appear on the Newcastle scene, launching on 27/11/09 at the Lounge. I think the immediate concern there is that it’s the lounge.. I can think of few more random venues for a rock night, tho in saying that Legends rock nights started out as a Monday night venture in a predominantly dance/pop orientated club, so maybe it’s not all that important after all.

With the flyer and facebook group being the main information we have to go on at the moment, it looks as though they’re going for the appeal-to-the-masses approach. Nothing exciting from the obligatory list of artists they’ll be playing, which according to their facebook includes the likes of; Incubus, Rise Against, Pendulum, Fall Out Boy, Justin Trousersnake, Jimmy Eat World, Foo Fighters, Drowning Poo, The Offspring, Rammstein, Beastie Boys, Nickelcack, Sum 41, Less Than Jake, Korn, Guns N Roses, Bloodhound Gang, Linkin Poop, Green Day, Lostprophets, Chemical Brothers, Pap Roach, No Doubt, Enter Shikari, Metallica, Alkaline Trio, Feeder, Rage Against The Machine, Nine Inch Nails, Prodigy, Reel Big Fish, Buck Cherry, Slipknot, A, Good Charlotte, Soil, Funeral For A Friend, New Found Glory, Killswitch Engage, Coheed and Cumbria, Goldfinger, Deftones, Queen, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Flogging Molly, Muse, Paramore, Journey, Panic! At The Disco, Bon Jovi, The Used, Kings Of Leon, +44, Transplants, Finch, Alien Ant Farm, BMFV, Aerosmith, Tenacious D, Gaslight Anthem, Trivium, Madness, The Distillers, Motorhead, Biffy Clyro, Queens Of The Stone Age, Disturbed, Jurassic 5, Blink 182, Dropkick Murphies, Marilyn Manson, 30 Seconds To Mars, Alexisonfire, Rob Zombie… and much more.

Phew.. god bless cut ‘n paste. Scanning over that mammoth list reveals few surprises, but at the same time there’s nothing truly offensive or massively out of place.

Drinks offers include the usual £1/£1.50 shots that everywhere seems to offer these days, VK/Carlsberg bottles for £1.50, JD + mixer £1.95 and Jager Bombs for £2.50. Again, nothing massively outstanding there, but for a weekend it’s not bad, and shouldn’t break the bank.

Entry is going to be £3 before midnight, £5 after which isn’t unrealistic, and with Legends being the only competition on a Friday it could work out well for Distortion.. especially when Legends has it’s dance nights and what not on a Friday. As always, there’s two ways this could go. The majority could do the usual ‘we don’t like change round these parts’ and stick with Legends week in, week out as usual, or they could all go for the consistant weekly rock night.. One of the most annoying features of Legends Friday rock nights is not knowing whats on when, and if you turn up on the off chance of a rock night and get shindig, you’re gonna be dissapointed. But enough of Legends, that’s not what we’re here for today; as I’ve said, it could go either way and only time is going to tell.

The final point worth bringing up is, of course, the DJs. Currently listed DJs are Ash (Krash/Venue), Muppet (Cathouse Glasgow) and DJ Wheezy + Guests. Muppet you’re more likelyto remember from the Academy rock nights back when they used to be good, in the good old days with Bruce. After their departure it all went downhill for the Academy, so hopefully Muppet’ll be able to bring a touch of his magic to Distortion. Ash of course DJs Krash, Venues saturday night offering, and if he can bring a few of Krash’s hardcore loyalist supporters along, it could turn Distortion into a night to be reckoned with. And if anyone knows who DJ Wheezy is give me a heads up and i’ll update the article!

So yes, a promising new night, playing popular rock with cheap drinks on a Friday night. We’ll just have to see if it can manage to avoid the curse of the Newcastle rock scene, and last past it’s first month. I’ll be checking this night out, and so should you.. See you at the bar!

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In a sudden (and shocking) move, Legends has unexpectedly dropped Saturday night mainstay ‘The Bunker’ from it’s Saturday night side room. From 2005 the Bunker has been Legends enduring success story. While other side room nights have came and gone, indeed while Friday nights in the main room were turned over to indie denying the rock scene a Friday rock night, the Bunker continued as the longest running and most successful of the side room nights.
Of course this just makes Legends actions in letting their most successful side room go all the more bizarre.
We understand that for the next two weeks Saturdays are going to feature Tech Noir (14/11/09) followed by a one off Friday I’m In Love (21/11/09), with the Saturdays following being given over to the people from Sumo – Having never been to a Sumo night I find myself ill placed to comment, however I have heard it described as a similar night to Krash, and as a cross between Legends main room and a low budget Krash – neither description filling me with confidence.
As I’m sure you’ll all know Krash is the only serious rival to Legends Saturday nights, and has an extremely loyal fan base. I can’t help but anticipate a massive fail in the near future. While curiosity will no doubt fill the first couple of nights, the loyal Krash customers will filter back to Krash, and the Legends goers will stay upstairs; if they wanted to go to Krash they’d already be there…
While we can’t argue with Legends wanting to try new things, in the current climate (both in the rock scene, and in a wider sense), it seems strange that now is the time they’ve chosen to make such a sudden change to their Saturday night line up. What next? Bring Redeemer to the main room on a Saturday?

Of course the danger in all this is that in dropping  the Bunker for a night that’s yet to prove itself in Newcastle could lead to an unfortunate situation on Saturdays. The Bunker, as I mentioned, has been the longest running and most successful of Legends side rooms; how long do the people from Sumo have to prove themselves? Weeks? Months? Then will we see a new ‘flavour of the weak week’ to try and do better? Which will lead to Saturdays at Legends beginning to suffer from the ‘What’s on? and When?’ that’s hindered Legends Friday night offerings. Fridays at Legends have been a haphazard affair of late, with rock nights getting booted for an indie offering, then a return to mostly rock with the occasional dance night.. and no clear idea of exactly what’s on when. There have been attempts to rectify this, such as the Official Legends Events group on Facebook; just how helpful this is has got to be questioned when even now it’s advertising The Bunker as on every Saturday, and there’s no event listed for tonight.
On a similar note, there’s always the risk that people are going to be offended by a mis-advertised night. While I like a bit of industrial/cyber at times, if I turned up tonight expecting some ska punk shenanigans I’d be less than impressed.
I would also  like to take this opportunity to thank the guys from the Bunker for keeping the Bunker Lovin going for so long, and never failing to entertain. I have absolutely no doubt that this isn’t the last we’ve seen from The Bunker and that they’ll be back; bigger, stronger and better than ever! There will be bunker lovin’ again in the future!

 You can still hear Mr Peach on a Tuesday at Northumbria Universities Get ‘Y Skates On, and Carter assures us he has plans for the new year. We look forward to seeing what they’re going to come up with, but for now Saturdays just won’t be the same.
Now go visit the Bunker Facebook Group and give them some love!

All photos taken from The Bunker Facebook Group

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To celebrate their new menu, our friends at Trillians are having a rather remarkable launch offer! This Thursday between 12-4, the first 75 customers to order food with the special pass phrase will get their food absolutely free!  And since the fella’s at Trills are, well, fucking awesome, they’ve kindly given me the password to give to you all!

Your password is: ‘Chef to false metal’

So to recap, you get yourselves down to Trillians this Thursday between 12 and 4, you pick what you want to eat from their new menu, you get yourself to the bar and when you order your food you say ‘Chef to false metal’! If enough people go down and make this a success, rumour has it a similar offer may follow in the days to come… So ya’ll better get down there ’cause I for one am unemployed and like the idea of free meals!

Myself, -kay-, serafine and ruthleton went down there today to take advantage of the first day of the offer, and I have to say the new menu is an improvement on the old one! The food is certainly now of a higher quality so you wouldn’t be let down even if it wasn’t free! There were some happy and full TL’ers after the meal! Plus you know, you get all the extra benefits of Trills to add on top of the free food. A decent selection of lagers, all your discount card offers, some awesome friendly staff, and some half decent tunage.

I’ll see you all at the bar!

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Now what would you say to seeing a band from the original New Wave of British Heavy Metal (NWOBHM) movement in Newcastle’s premier rock bar? What if it was on a Friday night, thus making it an ideal way to kick start your weekend? What if you were told that the lead guitarist of said band was Neil Buchanan of Art Attack fame?

“SAY WHAT NOW!?”

Yes, I shit you not. Formed in 1976, in the rock and roll capital of Liverpool, Marseille were at the forefront of the NWOBHM scene with the likes of Saxo n, Tank and Iron Maiden. They had toured with legendary acts such as UFO, Whitesnake, Judas Priest and Ian Gillan. However, the demise of their record label, Mountain Records, meant they never got great success and the eventually broke up in the 80s. Now after many years, the band are now back up to their old tricks and are touring to belt out some old and new tunes to venues across the U.K.

The history lesson now aside, the night had arrived and the band did their soundtrack to light applause. Buchanan mused over the microphone “I think that’s the best response we’ve ever had for a sound check!” He then liaised with the sound guy, and approached our table to have a bit of a chat with my accomplice, who befriended him an hour earlier. We exchanged a few words and I got the privilege of high five-ing the much revered man. He then marked his goodbye by exclaiming that he was off to get pissed.

Neil Buchanan, a hero from my childhood, had just told me that he’s off to get pissed. I was sat with shock and awe.

So it’s time for the band to come on. The venue was packed out and everyone greatly anticipated the show. The first thing that struck me about them was how much a good guitar player Buchanan actually is, especially his lead work. The master of art had turned into a God of rock. His tone is quite crisp for a rock band, and has a lot of bite to it. There wasn’t much remarkable about the singer Nige Roberts, but he had a good hard rock voice and fitted the band very well. The rhythm section was provided by Andy Charters on rhythm guitar, Steve Dinwoodie on bass and Keith Knowles on drums. This is where band drawn my one main criticism. While the drumming provided a solid, albeit basic, beat the rest of the rhythm section lacked in volume to be heard properly. Aside from this one minor flaw, the band blazed through the set with high spirits throughout. The set was a fair mix of old and new material, and included new stuff from their upcoming album, which is due to be released March next year. There was some good on stage craic as well:

“Right, we’re going to play a song which was written when a lot of you were still swimming in your Dad’s bollocks!” Neil was obviously commenting upon the low average age of the crowd. Then finally, we got the inevitable Art Attack reference. Someone handed Mr. Buchanan a picture, to which he remarked “I’ve always said that you don’t need to be a great artist in order to be an artist.” The crowd roared with cheer. He then added on “… But this is just shit!” The roar of cheer quickly turned into a roar of riotous laughter.

The crowd met the end of each track to great applause and some over enthusiastic members of the audience got up on stage to back the band up when playing the song “Do It The French Way.” Naturally, an encore was played as the mob demanded it.

Overall, a very enjoyable gig and I very much hope that they come back around when their album comes out in March 2010.

Review Courtesy of that_jamie_fella

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